However when you eliminate the desire for a social life (spend your time watching re-runs and making youtube videos), mall shopping (thanks to the internet boutiques) and all other forms of human communication (minus the mail guy at work), those odds become quite miniscule....
He was a friend that I wont go into very much detail about. A good friend. For whatever reasons, he and his brother moved away to Dubai. Now I wish I could say that it was him that I ran into today....but it wasn't.
It was a man I haven't spoken to since he asked me to keep away from his brother oh some 10 years ago. He basically ruined what was an incredible relationship/friendship.
I was at the mall killing some time before meeting my friend for a movie. At a quick glance I saw him and quickly dodged into a store hoping he wasn't shopping for anything specific...Like childrens sunglasses and leggings.... When the coast was clear, I carried on with my browsing for a while knowing that he was, or at least should be at this point - at the complete opposite end of the mall...
I turned the corner while texting my friend who ironically had JUST sent me a message saying "OMG...guess who i just saw" or something along those lines....by the time I glanced up to ensure no one was going to crash into me.....yup...you guessed it. There he was!!
Only a few feet away from me....I glanced back down at my phone and starting pouring sweat. After playing out every possible scenario - all of which ended poorly - I decided to suck it up and say hello...
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Me: "Omg! What are you doing here!" *Awkward*
**HUGS**
Him: "Whaaaat! Whats up! Ooops, I just stepped on your toe..."
*Me Thinking:* "Is he saying my feet are large....Omg can he smell the sweat off me? This hug is taking too long...he can def smell the sweat off me...Did I even put on any perfume??"
Him: Oh you know...just shopping for some shoes" *Awkward*
Me: "No, I mean here in Windsor, are you guys not living in Dubai anymore?
Him: "I go back and forth...I'm everywhere!"
*Me Thinking: "Wowww....Still an arrogant dick"*
Me: "Hey, I'm running late, but it was so nice to see you again! Take care!"
Him: "Yeah you too!"
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KILL ME NOW. Sweat pouring down my body...I am 40 lbs heavier than the last time I saw him or his brother...Which means when he talks to him (which I'm sure he called him probably minutes after walking away from me) he is going to tell him how fat I've gotten, and how hes lucky he didnt try to pursue me...
Well listen here asshole! This is stress weight! And I've actually lost 15lbs of it! So the jokes on YOU, cause I was fatter a few months ago! So HA!
Something tells me he has no idea I've lost any weight considering my facebook photos are all from my thinner days...*sigh*
After removing my bubble jacket - yeah...it gets worse...I was wearing a puffer jacket! Which only added to my bloatyness...Which means I didnt look like I lost those 15lbs anyways! I gave my pits a chance to semi-air dry...I sent my friend a message stating "I may have you beat....i just ran into worse.."
Stacey and I discussed the complete randomness that had just ensued. She had not seen her ex boyfriend for at least 6 years. She is now married, and moved on in her life and career, and yet her ex was still in his same old mess. She too felt all the sweaty nerves seeping out of her pits...and also attempted to end the conversation asap. Although she is happily married, she mentioned that of course she had to run into him when she was looking like shit. Which if any of you knew my friend - you know its impossible for her to ever look bad.
Why is it that when we leave the house, we think we look pretty damn good...Until you get into certain dressing room lighting, or case in point...we run into someone we didnt want to see...
Why dont we put on a full face, or our best shoes? Why do we always sacrifice how we look for the sake of "just going to the movies" or "to pick up some milk". Because its dark in there, and no one should be looking at me...they should be watching the damn movie. But isnt it just our luck that when we neglect ourselves....it is those days that we run into the people we wished to have completely forgotten about...
When I got home, I told my husband about the 2 incredibly ironic encounters...and as I sat on my couch contemplating just how much weight the brother had thought I had put on....I couldnt help but feel like it happened for a reason. Today is Staceys husbands birthday. His first birthday since they've been a married couple...What are the odds of that....?
As for myself...Although it wasnt my old friend (still living in Dubai)
The thing that got me thinking was the strangeness that my best friend and I - at different parts of the mall - at the exact same moment - had just run into someone we both had not seen in a long time. And seemed to experience the same symptoms: sweaty pits, overheating and completely awkward conversation skills...
I dont know what to make of it. Irony. I know... but nothing so coincidental has ever happened to me before..
Well..that is all for tonight...But..I'll leave you with this:
Xoxo,
Mariam Monroe
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